Rememberance
by Kaneriya
Summary: Humanity wins. But she loses. [[ Reincarnation fic. Mentions of character death and gore. ]]


"-You can't leave me, Eren."

Composure fails to keep intact, hot tears trailing down pallid cheeks. She hardly breaks- she is merciless; ruthless. But the facade comes crashing down, crimson hues covering her entire vision.

And she's holding him.

Everyone is recovering, tending to their injuries. There's too much going on at the moment, and no one realizes that he's fading. Brown optics search around in desperation, hoping that Armin would be able to help her, but everyone is too busy to notice; too busy to mourn.

But for a brief moment, eyes meet with the corporal's, and she hesitates at the sight- there's remorse in those normally blank eyes. But he tears his gaze away because he knows what's going to happen.

And there is nothing they can do about it.

"Did we win, Mikasa?"

The words come out harshly, coughs leaving the male as he winces in pain, blood covering nearly every inch of his body. Their clothes are stained, the once white cloth drowned in red. He's injured badly- but he'll make it.

_He'll survive._

She repeats it in her mind over and over again, anxiety building at every attempt of reassurance. They've gone this far- she's gone _so _far to protect him. And she won't lose him now.

But those emerald eyes that held so much determination seem to be fading as he clings onto life, shallow breaths escaping his lips.

He's leaving her.

She was his guardian; his protector. She kept him from pain whenever she could- and she would do that now, regardless of how much she hated it. Reassurance would be the thing to set him at peace.

"-Yes," comes the quiet response, voice shaking. "We won. We did it."

A smile comes across his lips, and Mikasa can see his eyes dulling.

"You can let go now, Eren."

The words are barely above a whisper as she holds onto his crimson stained hands, vision blurring at she bites back a sob, grasp on him tightening as if she could keep him with her forever.

And Eren is gone.

Humanity wins.

But she loses.

* * *

He has dreams.

They're confusing as hell- he can never understand them. They're out of the blue, completely random. He's fighting- he's screaming, he's witnessing so many people die in front of his eyes.

There's too much pain. When he wakes up, his head is pounding, and for a brief moment, emerald optics catch sight of a faint scar on his hand. But when he checks it once more, it's gone.

But he figures it's just something stupid- maybe all those energy drinks he has to stay up for school are taking its toll on him.

But still, curiosity never leaves him.

There are giants; the enemy, he presumes. Their faces are horrifying; amused killers, amused hunters.

And oddly, there's some parts of his dream where he's punching the hell out of them- he doesn't know how that's possible, considering that they're as tall as buildings.

But hey, when did dreams ever make sense?

Eren disregards them once more, eyes glancing down at his hand, hoping to see the scar.

But it's not there.

-x-

Exams are coming up soon. He's twenty now, and college is horrible. Armin helps him a lot with understanding lectures, and he's always sensed something strange about the blond. It's like he knows him- but he doesn't. But there are moments where Armin acts fucking weird, like he's concerned for no reason about Eren. He asks about fighting sometimes- it's not normal small talk.

It doesn't make sense, and it drives him mad.

But he's studying on his own today, a weary expression on his features as he enters the library. Several familiar faces are here- ones he can't seem to figure out where they're from. But it doesn't really matter, considering that Eren hardly talks to them in the first place. Some of them give him uneasy or expecting glances, especially Annie and Jean.

-Whatever, they're not really friends. They can mind their own business.

Digits gently touching the spines of the books displayed, he hums quietly, green eyes searching for a specific book. Paying attention was never really Jaegar's thing, unfortunately. Too focused on finding the required item, he bumps into someone, a frown tugging at his lips before he apologizes.

And he finds himself face to face with Mikasa.

Ackerman, was it?

She's one of the quieter ones, only talking when necessary. He doesn't really notice her, considering he's only talked to her once about how much he liked her scarf. But like Armin, she seems vaguely familiar.

"-Sorry. I should have been paying attention."

Brown hues meet green, and for a moment, she says nothing, gaze burning into his. It's as if she's trying to figure him out- trying to read him for any reaction to her presence.

"It's okay," the female replies quietly, focusing her stare on the textbooks. "Do you need help?"

"No, I can find it. Thanks, though."

He finds himself looking at her, brows furrowing in frustration as he attempts to find where she's from. From the moment they met, he knew that he had seen her before.

-And suddenly, his dreams come to mind once more, the sound of Mikasa yelling for him to run away causing his body to go rigid. She's fighting with him- she's _protecting_ him. There's too many images in his mind at the moment, head beginning to ache.

"We won."

The words are blurted out suddenly, both surprised at his outburst. But there's apprehension on her typically stoic features.

He can't think properly, sudden scenes racing through his head. He remembers blood- lots of it. And he remembers this intense pain, but there's a comforting grip. Someone is holding his hand. There's someone's voice- it sounds like Mikasa, but it's too distorted to confirm.

He can't see their face, but the last thing he remembers seeing is a red scarf.

Eyes widen at the possibility, although he knows it's a stupid thing to believe.

"-Have we met before?"

Desperation on his features, he watches as she freezes, hand subconsciously clutching the cloth, holding it closer to her chest. Mikasa says nothing, a brief moment of shock taking over her neutral expression. It's as if she's contemplating; fighting herself about what to say next.

And he hopes that she says yes- she says that she remembers him, she says she remembers holding his hand.

"You spoke to me after class once."

"No, not that," he replies quickly, "I mean- did we ever _fight_ together? I know it sounds stupid, but you just- you look so familiar. I remember fighting with you. You always protected me."

And she grows more tense, more frightened as he continues to speak. But she doesn't let it show because she knows much better than that.

"I don't know what you're talking about." comes the response, feign confusion in it. Mikasa forces herself to walk away, leaving behind a puzzled companion.

He remembers, and he shouldn't.

She loved him- she still does, but even if they have normal lives now, she can't be with him. Because there's too much in her mind, and if it unravels, then she'll fall apart.

Eren can never know.

As footsteps pick up their pace, she makes eye contact with Armin.

They've both recalled their past lives for a long time now- some of the others on their squad have, as well. But they never talk about it. A mere nod of the head in the blond's direction confirms his thoughts, and a look of sorrow appears on his face as he returns the gesture.

_Dwelling on the past will not let you continue with the present._

And she can feel herself tearing up because she desperately wants to hug Eren, wants to thank him for remembering, but she _can't_.

Because even in this life, she has to protect him.

* * *

[ x ] - Ah, I hope you guys enjoyed this! I've been wanting to do a oneshot like this for a while. It took about half an hour- which is really fast for me, so there might be some errors here and there.

Thank you for reading!


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